Let's Change For Ourselves

However, once she takes her feet out of comfort zone, then she gets inclined towards being conscious of herself, her look and how she projects

Dec. 14, 2020, 4:46 p.m. Published in Magazine Issue: VOL. 14 No. 09, December 25, 2020 ( Paush 10, 2077) Publisher: Keshab Prasad Poudel Online Register Number: DOI 584/074-75

Whether it is for hanging out with friends at 10 pm at night or before putting on some clothes to go somewhere, it is she, who often has to undergo tons of trials from her wardrobe before she finally gets the proper outlook. Putting on some clothes upon her comforts or dealing pressure to behave in a certain way isn't really a matter of choice anymore when people out there are already sketching the dubious lines on their head.

However, once she takes her feet out of comfort zone, then she gets inclined towards being conscious of herself, her look and how she projects. As stepping out, means getting herself tied up in her own fear. The fear that curls up her throughout isn't enough that she steps herself back somewhere down, and diving into her self-doubts, she is compelled to think,' what if my clothes are too short, too small, or if my V necklines that are too tight, or if my lipstick that are too brighter, or if my way of behaving?''

Moreover, this can lead her into being more fearful than ever. Getting wrapped up herself into these thoughts and notions built around her, yet, she contrive for what the best suits her. She does everything in regard to what people demand, and yet, she gets tormented. She walks taking her own path in constructing herself as 'self- secured' but it is about the question of insecurity that is instilled by an outsider in her head that can just pull her apart.

Surprisingly, these are just the samples or lines of judgements drawn in their heads. Having been born into a society that holds different ideologies for both girls and boys is not a nature of wonderness. As long as one's way of behaving, one's way of speaking and one's way of wearing is fine with oneself, and doesn't do any harm on other parts, it itself becomes a matter of self- choice and not something that turns into a debatable topic for the outside people.

We know the fact that the society we live in, has a distinct gender binary. It is important how our society teaches values to children as it can perpetuate gender inequality. At a very young age, when a girl grows up, she is scrutinized upon her every action about how politely she talks, how polite she behaves, and how polite she puts on clothes. But alas! These are things that can only limit her voice for the moment and not for the raging voice that is already inside her mind because the mindset that imposes on her own belief is self-destructing that she later ends up believing into it, confining herself somewhere behind the dubious sketches created on people's heads.

Hence, if we want our girls to get out of this, we must be the one to let go of them and not hold onto them that if girls are to be reminded of her way to put on clothes giving shape to a body then, it's for boys to be reminded of their way to shape their mental outlook. If girls are to be reminded of her way to speak, then it's for boys to be reminded of their way to behave them. If girls are to be reminded of her self-respect, then it's for boys to be reminded of their sense of dignity. Having said so, values must be transmitted equally to both the genders.

Lastly, if the society can hold all children to the same tenets, of self-respect and kindness,then, society can promote a more inclusive understanding that children of all gender are capable enough to respect and celebrate individuality. So, to every mother, to every daughter, to every sister, and to every daughter-in-law, let them learn and embrace themselves as they are.

Not just that, let every boy, and every man learn that outlook appearance does not have much impact until you yourself create wrong illusions in your head. It is just the matter of self-choice, the values that they inhibit at a younger age, and the mindset they keep. In the end, what counts is your individuality; the contentment you derive.

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